You know that moment when you’ve had a few too many bad days in a row, and you finally sit down and think, Okay, seriously — what is wrong with me?

And then you answer yourself with something smug like, “I just procrastinate too much,” or “I self-sabotage — that’s my pattern.”

It feels almost satisfying to say it, right? Like you cracked the code. Like now you’ve diagnosed yourself, so… problem solved.

Except… no.

What you’ve really done is slap a name tag on your problem, called it “self-awareness,” and then patted yourself on the back for being so insightful.

Meanwhile, nothing in your actual life changes.

Here’s the sneaky thing about self-awareness — it’s like having spinach in your teeth. You think you’d notice it right away, but most of the time, other people see it before you do.

And here’s the truth:Everyone thinks they’re already self-aware. Especially people with ADHD. We live in our heads so much, it’s easy to believe we’ve got ourselves all figured out.

You’ve probably said some of these before:

“I know I procrastinate. I just need to try harder.”
“I always self-sabotage. That’s just my pattern.”
“I know what my problem is… I just haven’t fixed it yet.”

Sounds self-aware, right?Not so fast.

If your life still feels like you’re stumbling through a maze, hitting the same dead ends again and again — and you can’t explain exactly why — then no, you’re not truly self-aware.

Real self-awareness means you understand exactly what’s going wrong, and when, and why.

You can point to the exact spots where you get lost. You can name the traps. You can see them coming before you face-plant into them again.

Here’s where my self awareness differs from the norm:

I know when I’m avoiding things.
I know when I’m BS’ing myself.

I still fall for my own tricks sometimes, but the difference is:

I can see it in real time.
I can spot my ego making "excuses" as they start to creep in.
I can call myself out before it spirals into complete self-delusion.

Now, let me add something I’ve learned the hard way:

If I can’t be honest about where the problems in my life come from — Then I’m nowhere close to solving them.

If I keep blaming someone else — when in reality, it’s on me — but my lack of true self-awareness keeps me from recognizing that… then I’m doomed to repeat it. Over and over.

And here's the part that scares me the most (and it should you too). What if, when things go wrong, the whole time I'm completely convinced its "not me"...but it really is?

How much time are you willing to waste believing its "not you"?

“If You Don’t Know What’s Holding You Back — That’s What’s Holding You Back”

The ultimate test of self-awareness isn’t whether you can list your flaws like a personality quiz.It’s whether you can describe — in detail — the mechanism that trips you up.

Not “I procrastinate.” That’s too vague.

I mean: can you pinpoint the moment your brain slips into “later” mode? Can you describe the exact thought or feeling that pushes you to open Instagram instead of sending that email?

If you can’t… you’re still flying blind.

And here’s the thing: if your go-to reaction when life goes sideways is, “Why does this always happen to me?” or “People just never come through for me,” then — surprise — it’s not bad luck.

It’s you.

That’s not an insult. That’s actually the best news you could get.Because if it’s you, that means you have control. You can change it.

Here’s the blunt truth:If you’ve ever said “Nothing ever works out for me” and you cannot articulate why… you don’t have full self-awareness. Period.

And you’re not weird for that.

Most people spend their entire lives replaying the same patterns without realizing they’re stuck in a loop.

They blame the outcomes. They blame the people around them. They blame fate.

They never stop to notice that there’s one common denominator in every scenario they live through:

Themselves.

That’s not shame. That’s freedom.Because once you spot the pattern, you can stop running it.

Why This Is the First Step

Here’s why I’m hitting you with self-awareness before anything else in this course:

It’s the starting line for every meaningful change you’ll ever make.

If you don’t see exactly what’s holding you back — and you’re not brave enough to be honest about it — you’ll waste months, years, maybe even decades putting effort into the wrong things.

Think of it like this: if you want to be a singer but you sound like a donkey with a head cold, you can do all the vocal warm-ups you want. You can buy the nice mic. You can post TikToks every day. But you’re still avoiding the truth — you simply aren't as good as you think you are.

That’s the danger of skipping self-awareness: you can be working hard and still be walking in the wrong direction.

How far are you willing to go down that road?How much time are you willing to waste?

I don't want either...

What I want is results — not an ego boost, not the need to be right, but rather: "what is right?" — "What's truly happening in this situation?"

How do I fix this problem for good so I can move forward?

Life is already going to throw you challenges you have no control over — those are tough enough.

But when you stack self-imposed roadblocks on top of them simply because you’re willfully ignoring the truth (or too protective of your ego to face it), you’re guaranteeing failure before you’ve even really started.

So here’s the deal: if you want a real shot at building the life you actually want, you must — must — be both willing and able to see the ways you’ve been sabotaging yourself.

This isn’t about shaming yourself.

It’s about stripping away the blindfold so you can finally find an exit out of the "nothing ever works out for me" prison.

Once you can see the road clearly, every bit of effort you put in actually moves you forward.

That’s when momentum becomes real.

And that’s when the life you want stops being a fantasy and starts being possible.

What to Focus on Right Now

Okay, so here’s what you're going to do next.

Your assignment for this week. And I mean literally this week, starting today:

Catch yourself in the act.

Not later. Not at bedtime when you’re ruminating. In the moment.The second you:

Avoid a task
Feel yourself checking out
Make an excuse
Blame someone else without really thinking it through

…pause for two seconds and name exactly what just happened.

Here’s the difference between vague and useful self-awareness:

Vague: “I procrastinated.”
Useful: “I opened TikTok because I have trouble starting tasks I don't feel like doing. I falsely convinced myself I would feel like doing it after a "break".

Or:

Vague: “I didn’t follow through.”
Useful: “I told myself I’d start after lunch, but I knew that was just buying time because this project is overwhelming me.

Notice we’re not trying to fix anything yet. You’re not forcing a change. You’re just building the muscle of noticing.

Because self-awareness isn’t a switch you flip — it’s a muscle you train.

And the best training is catching your patterns in the wild.

Do this for a week and you’ll start to see the real, repeatable triggers that trip you up.

And once you can name your patterns? You can change them.

Here's a bonus

You are going to start to love how you feel about yourself when you confidently "own your shit".

Both the good and the bad, it doesn't matter, you own it all.

Shame can't stick to someone who can say, "yeah, I know, but I'm working on being better every day".

That is inspiring...

The strength that comes from a deeper "self knowing" builds confidence and self esteem.

You are finally building up your "true self" and not the false "image" of who you think others want to see. No more hiding.

But more on that in the next lesson...

Lesson 1 – You Aren’t Who You Think You Are

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